068 Stuff

Feb. 5th, 2015 08:50 am
autumnmuse: By me (Default)
I find it difficult to express myself when things are at their worst. Instead, I recoil into my own mind and stew over things until I can either move past them or ‘get over it’. That’s been me the last week or so. Dropping myself into World of Warcraft as an escape when I’m home, and either working on school work or writing fiction in my free time.

Of course, it’s around dad. This new chemo hits him a lot harder than the last two he had, and the fact he is going every week now versus the every other week with the other treatments, is really deteriorating him faster. He was looking so good and doing so well the last year, but in the last two months since on this new treatment, it’s like night and day. He’s always in bed, he doesn’t want to eat (because he just can’t—everything makes him nauseous or throw up), he has no energy, the other treatments didn’t make him lose his hair except a very little in the very beginning, but now he is completely bald ): And wears a cap all the time. He always looks pale and just so very very tired. Two nights ago he was in bed with a lot of stomach pains, and no matter what we did for him, he didn’t feel better. It’s just so hard to watch him like this and I can’t help but cry whenever I get a moment to myself to really just be alone. I try not to let myself be alone though … hence the always playing WoW now, or trying to always be around someone else…because it forces me to be strong and not cry.

I’m so glad I am in school though. It’s amazing how much thinking about assignments or working or reading for class distracts me. If I think too hard, I just might end up in the looney bin.

This of course means I’ve been a shitty friend because I’ve been neglecting my friend’s page. My sincerest apologies ): I hope to get back to being better about that soon.

In other borning news, we’ve gotten a crapton of snow. The storm they said was supposed to be snowgeddon and ended up not being much? It came the following Monday when they said we weren’t going to get all that much and to not worry – ended up getting almost 2 feet! Everything is piled high on street corners making it almost impossible to see around, and I’m amazed I don’t see more accidents on the road due to that. Worst part? It’s snowing again this morning (only a few inches today to stop at 11am) …but supposedly it’s going to start snowing Saturday night and basically not stop until Tuesday night. Yeah. I don’t know how ‘much’ snow its supposed to be each day (if just a little flurry here and there, but definite snowfall) or if it will be a full blown snow storm for the those days … I really hope its not the latter. While I like a storm here and there to miss a day of work, I do not like having THIS much snow ruining morning and afternoon commutes for days on end. Ugh.

It does make for a pretty landscape where is untouched by road salt and dirt, and cars plowing through it on a daily basis. I might (if I actually feel like getting cold and probably soaked) take my camera and go out to a nearby park Saturday and snap some photographs. I haven’t done that in years and I am kind of itching to. If it’s bad out though on Saturday, I most likely won’t. While I trust MY driving (duh) … I really don’t trust other people’s (:D).

AND, I just made it in time to check in at [community profile] getyourwordsout for my 200K pledge. So far this year I've written a total of 19,647 words! That includes the book I'm writing plus the short story I shared here earlier in the month about Zombies.
autumnmuse: By oh_cheezit.dreamwidth.org (Bones - OMFG)
Apparently we’re getting Snowgeddon tonight, all day tomorrow, and into early Wednesday. They’re saying about 30inches of snow for us by the end of the whole ordeal. While I am glad this means we get out early today, have tomorrow off and probably will have a delayed opening on Wednesday … Wtf mother nature?! That’s a lot of snow. It’s like she saves it all up all winter long and then drops it on us, snickering “Ha-ha!” Sweet molasses I have no idea how we’re going to clean that all up, and where we are going to put it all. The last time we had this much snow, it was impossible to see the road backing out of the driveway … and that’s pretty dangerous.

But yeah … definitely no work tomorrow for us, which means I’ll be up all night playing World of Warcraft. My friend BL, his friend and I did a handful of dungeon runs on Saturday and got our toons leveled to 30, as well as got about 80 achievements for the guild (and gold, from running dungeons). We had fun, so hopefully tonight we can run a few more and get to 40 or 50.

Yesterday, I spent most of the day at the brother’s house. It was my Godmother and uncle’s 43rd wedding anniversary and she wanted to cook for us (I know…their anniversary but they wouldn’t let us cook!) … the food was absolutely amazing. I am still drooling thinking about it. She made turkey, stuffing, candied yams, and her famous bacalao dish (dried and salted cod fish for the non-Portuguese :D)… so delicious.

We did get them a cake, so we had some of that a bit later in the afternoon with espressos (or as we say, Bicas). Hung out, and it was really great. The “kids” (who aren’t kids anymore, but we still call ourselves this) hung out in the basement and watched movies. I saw a film that I can’t yet explain how I feel about. It’s called Stoker. It’s about a young woman whose father dies unexpectedly and out of the blue an uncle she never knew existed shows up and begins living with them. Her mother has basically lost all her marbles and drinks way too much wine in her condition. The movie is this oddly incestual (yeah I make up words) film that is not incestual ….but it gives up these really weird vibes. Basically her uncle is … different (I’ll put it that way) … and she knows there’s something up with him, and so much so she becomes obsessed with him (and he her). It was just a very odd movie, and just …weird (yeah, I know they mean the same thing—see how confused I am!). I still have no idea how I really feel about it, which might mean it is a good movie, but I am not sure yet. It’s classified as Thriller/Mystery, and it is partially but it should also have “wtf is going on in this movie” as a genre.

So yeah, watched that. Then I started to watch Premium Rush, but we decided to head home when I was about halfway, so I didn’t get to finish it. I might check it out later. Got home, and watched Dirty Dancing because I was feeling in an 80s mood… and also got about halfway in a new book I started at the bros. It’s got me hooked so I’ll probably finish it tonight.

So that was my weekend. Oh yeah, class Saturday got cancelled because of a smaller storm we got. So I got out of that :D It was a nice weekend indeed! I am actually thinking of just dropping the communications class. I am just not feeling it. Especially since I sent him three emails with the class list I promised to type of him and he still hasn’t ever responded to me to confirm he got it. For a professor in communications he really sucks at communicating. I’m just so annoyed by this, that I don’t even want to take the class anymore. I have until this weekend to decide, but I’m pretty set on my decision so I might just do it tonight.

And they just confirmed we’re getting out at 3pm today and definitely closed tomorrow. Maybe it will be Snowgeddon!
autumnmuse: By me (Default)
It's only January 3rd and we're already getting our first real snowfall this winter. More than the little dusting we had back in early December. There's about two inches so it should be stopping soon ha-ha. Why couldn't this have fallen on a work day? *grin* LOL

I just drove down the street and down two more in it to get a Subway sammich because I am starving. So, thought I'd do January 3rd's question from the January meme. :D

What is your dream profession?
- Submitted by [personal profile] serys 

Growing up I always wanted to be a teacher. I remember people always telling me I’d make a great teacher some day. I lost out to fear. I just can’t overcome the idea of failing at it, so I kind of gave up on going for it. Plus, I've always gotten comfortable at my jobs, that I never had a huge desire to go for it again (except the collections job... by the end of that I was ready to be a pig farmer).

My other dream profession is being a professional fiction writer. I love writing. I have loved it since I was a child. I was that kid that carried a notebook everywhere she went and scribbled away while others chatted. I was the kid that would write short story after short story while people stared at me like I had completely lost it  lol … hell, I am still that kid, but instead of a notepad it’s a laptop or a tablet. Maybe someday I won't be a chickenshit anymore :D

Speaking of writing, going to go do a little reading :D
autumnmuse: by shalowater.livejournal.com (Small Xmas Tree)
To set up our Christmas tree and village, but since we’re going away for that week, we never set it up (it just ends up being a lot of work for us not to even enjoy it on Christmas). So we usually set the whole thing up every two years. Yet for some reason, we didn’t do it last year, and I’m trying to remember why but I can’t. Oh well … Here are photos from our 2011 set up.

BUT, here’s what it looks like from the stairs (my view as I come downstairs from my bedroom).

*happy sigh* I guess I can just stare at the pics all day, haha!

In other news, I really am not into this WoW Expansion. I really tried the last two days, but my heart just isn’t in it. So I need a new game to fill my free time. Any ideas? Preferably a ‘no monthly fee’ type of game.

I do think I want to get back into making graphics though (there’s one in this photo set lol) … I remember I used to have a lot of fun making icons and banners, and all sorts of good stuff, but then my computer fritz’d on me, I replaced the hard drive and could not find my photoshop CD (I used elements). I may just use Christmas money to get a new digital copy (never get lost bwahahah) and get back into that.

I also still have that damn book idea floating around in my head but with all the school writing I’ve been doing the last thing I want to do is … write. Sad, I know. I am hoping I can get some done during the break. I’ve written the ideas down, so I’m not too worried about them disappearing, but I’m itching to write but just don’t have the energy for it lol

Anywho …it sleeted last night, but since it turned to rain early enough this morning we didn’t get a work delay, but people are still not here (and it’s been an hour), so it’s very quiet at work lol … Now it’s pouring like crazy out and it’s supposed to be like that the next few days. I love rain, but only when I am home and can doze in and out to it :D

025 Friday!

Dec. 5th, 2014 11:50 am
autumnmuse: by oh_cheezit.dreamwidth.org (Bones - Broil the Suspect)
Today marks 2 weeks left of work until our 2 week break for Christmas and New Years. I love my job :D I can't believe how quickly the time has flown recently. I think I'm thrown because of how close to December Thanksgiving was this year.

I finally got in a little shopping this week so boxes have been arriving every day, annoying my poor dad :D LOL He loves it though, it gives him something to do. I still have no idea what to get him. I did make a donation in his honor, but I need something he can open up on Christmas day. Ugh.

In other news, we're supposed to get some crappy sleet tonight, which won't end until sometime tomorrow morning. My class starts at 8am. There might be a chance that it's cancelled. This will suck of it does. I never thought I would say that, but it will. He is teaching us the last two chapters for next week's cumulative FINAL test. If we don't have class tomorrow, he'll most likely STILL put those two chapters on the test, and I will fail ... because I am a very visual learner and this class is already hard for me because it involves numbers, formulas and all kinds of other crap my brain just can't grasp.

So, I am hoping one of three things happens tomorrow:
1. We have class and all is good.
2. We don't have class, but he posts up a practice final so I can at least google the questions and figure out how to do the questions on my own via YouTube (which helped me with the last couple of tests).
3. Or he tells us to not worry about these last two chapters and simply study what we've learned to date for the final.

Fingers crossed! 

TGIF Everyone!
autumnmuse: by daxcat79.livejournal.com (Castle - Goofball)
So I forgot to post the dessert I made last week for Thanksgiving in the previous post. Here is a very crappy cell phone photo of it :D It was quite delicious and the hit of the lunch/dinner and I will probably make it again for Christmas (but probably cookies).

Other thing I forgot to mention is that the snow I wanted? We finally got a little bit Wednesday and it actually got us out of work early (five whole hours early for me :D). It wasn't a lot in the end, but it mixed in with some sleet around noon and the roads were pretty bad until the next morning. So YAY for some snow! Now just a little on Christmas and winter can go away :D


I really wish we still had more left now :D
autumnmuse: by breakthesky89.dreamwidth.org (Ironman - We have a Hulk)
I am about to admit something very blasphemous ...

I want snow.

I know, you're all shooting daggers at me right now, but *raspberries*. :D I only want that first, fresh, clean snowfall. I love the very first snowfall. it's all so beautiful, and the glistening sun off the white surfaces blinds you with joy. It's definitely cold enough here, so I am hoping we get a storm soon :D HAHA ... I know, I'm nuts.

Anywho! I was tagged by[personal profile] serys !

A. List seven habits/quirks/facts about yourself.
B. Tag seven people to do the same.

I tag -------»[personal profile] aldro ,[personal profile] blm ,[personal profile] booksyarntea [personal profile] thegrrlgeek ,[personal profile] feline_scribe and[personal profile] yada_yada.
  1. I have the really bad habit of jumping to conclusions or rushing immediately to ‘negative thoughts’. It’s a habit I am really trying to break away from, but it’s hard. I have pushed people away because of this, and I can admit it’s usually 90% my fault. Though, it is a little vindicating when the thoughts I had were actually true and the person was a piece of poo …but sometimes I wonder if I push them to be that way with my assumptions. I’ve gotten a lot better over the years, but it’s still a bad habit I’d like wiped.
  2. Like my journal friend who tagged me, I can’t sleep in total silence. I usually have some type of soothing noise in the background. Typically it’s my “rainfall” app which has a few good thunderstorm tracks that lull me to sleep. I love rain/thunderstorms.
  3. I find it odd that I really love history a LOT, but I rarely talk about it or ‘squee’ about it in my journal. I love to read about ancient times, and imagine what it must have been like to live in those conditions, etc. My favorite civilization were the Ancient Egyptians, and my favorite historic person is Cleopatra—what a sensation should would have been in today’s society (or Puritan society :D). I also do love early American history (not the slaughtering of thousands of innocent indigenous people of course).
  4. While I don’t believe 99% of the conspiracies out there in the world… I love to read and contemplate them. My favorite one of all time is also one of my favorite shows—Ancient Aliens. I love that show, and while a lot of it is just insane, I think it’s fascinating to think “What if?” LOL
  5. I loooooooove stuffed baby sheep and baby elephants. They’re just so damn cute. I actually have a decent sized collection of stuffed sheep, and the elephants are a recent “OMGTHEYRESOCUTEMUSTHAVE” obsession so I only have two of them.
  6. I burn quickly. I am very passionate, and that passion is quick to ignite and it burns fire hot…but it also fizzles quickly. I start projects all the time, get halfway, and abandon them. I’ll be super gung-ho about a video game, play it for a few weeks and then ditch it. I’ll start a scrapbook, get 10 pages done in two days, and then not touch it again for years. I don’t know if this is a bad habit, or if I just can’t make up my mind—ever.
  7. Some people eat when they’re stressed or things are out of control in their life. Me? I shop. It’s not healthy on my wallet. I’ve learned to keep it to small things, but it’s still something I do a lot … especially now that I have Amazon Prime. I’m always buying eBooks or regular books, movies, small things I don’t really need, but want and fill a different need. I guess it’s better than stuffing my face with Big Macs though, right? Right! :D

And now you all think I am a psycho :D I’m really not. These are kind of my worst qualities … and I’m usually good about controlling them (not always though LOL).


autumnmuse: By me (Default)

February 2015

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